Allison Update 4/13/14

 My Spring Break - pretty miserable, it was freezing and/or raining the entire time I was at the beach. So we were stuck inside a lot. The group I went with all love video games, which, I actually kind-of hate. I'm either playing, sucking at it and getting frustrated and anxious, or watching others and that's painfully boring. I was only there for 4 days and the day I had to head back to Clemmy, it was going to be 80 degrees and sunny. My luck right? but I had to get back to work.

My job at the name-less sub shop has been treating me pretty well, I do want to find another (possibly higher paying) job soon-ish; but it's not a top priority at the moment. If I do find one I hope for it to be at least slightly nursing related. I also want a job that won't require me to work GameDays (at least not all of them). First football season not doing marching band in 8 years, I want to be able to enjoy college life while it's still acceptable for my age. (P.s. Mr. H was apparently at my house today...needed cables and chatted with my dad....)

Still working on applying to the Nursing program. Won't hear form them until June. Taking Summer classes: Micro Bio, and Anatomy 2. Got all the classes and times I wanted, yay! Still don't know what field I want to go into. straight up strugglin'.  I feel that I was made to be a nurse though, you know? Like, out of the classes I'm taking this semester, I'm doing the best in my Anatomy class...so I'm really glad I switched.

Now onto personal life:

I really miss you guys. I also think that I need to find a new local group of friends. They're pretty much all completely self-serving. Like, I don't even know. They just don't care about anyone else but them. And I'm too passive to let them know that I'm upset, so it's just not a good combination. Even my roommate forgets everything I tell her, and a lot of my friends always change the subject to their own problems. whatever.

I sometimes feel as though I too have been suffering from severe sadness (maybe not depression, but I've been getting these moods of anxiety, sadness, extremely low self-esteem, feeling ugly and fat, useless....), I feel as though I should maybe go see someone about it, but then I just think that others have worse problems than me. I feel as though I'm just complaining most of the time and bothering other people, they really don't need to hear my problems. I don't want to go into too much detail on line. but, just felt like at least some of my friends should know. I have only spoken to one of my friends from down here about it, and it seems we both have the same shit going on, so that's been really helpful. But, we don't hang out too much so I don't get to rant everything out with her often. I haven't talked about this with the people I thought I considered to be my "closest" Clemson friends, I just don't think they'd understand, or care. I don't know.

I haven't been sleeping well,  eating well or exercising anymore because of classes and the low moods. A.k.a. staying up until 3am, saying "fuck it" and eating an entire gallon of ice cream, cookies, gummy bears and anything else I can get my hands on. Hopefully with the semester being over soon I can get back on track. and maybe if I can get my body into some form of shape my mood will improve. maybe i'll start tennis back up? cross your fingers!

Back to some lighter side stuff:
I'm thinking of doing the Disney College Program at some point. Also, whenever I finally graduate, I want to do one of those nurses-without-borders things, travel the globe and nurse in different countries, then come back and work in a hospital a while, and then eventually work as a park nurse for Disney (maybe my retirement years). I'm also trying to become a bit more in-tune with Judaism, practice a bit more often; I still keep kosher though! Which in the south is a pretty big deal.

 Love you all! Miss you all!

Congrats To Sushii! Like, engaged? What?!? No, but I'm so happy for you!
 and Giggles! Graduating on time?! No one does that these days!

Summer!

What is everyone's plans for summer? Are you going to be in Vienna at any point in time?

I'm working the US Open again this year, so I'll be in North Carolina for almost a month. After that, I'm trying to finish up my language requirement over the summer and make some money. So I'm not sure if I'll be doing that in NOVA or fredericksburg.